Nicknames

There comes a time in a person's life when they are known for something, good or bad, and it sticks with them for the rest of their life. Some nicknames are harmless, but most serve as an excuse to humiliate one in the future. All because your name was hard to pronounce or you did something when you were seven, you are mocked by a pet-like name for the rest of your existence.

The thing that really irritates me the most, is when people think they have grown up, but are clearly still attached to their childhood; when they go by their real name, but smack in the middle of their birthname, in quotations, is their nickname. Always lingering. What happens to these people when they decide to get a job, or go to a class reunion? Are they forever chastised about their other name? When they walk into a room does everyone say, "why hello, Sparky or is it Steve now?" making fun of what used to be a cool thing. How are employers dealing with this? I can only imagine what people put on job applications. Bosses everywhere must be taking advantage of these embarrasments by saying, "Oh it's Big Dog's shift this afternoon? Well tell him to punch out on time today, or else I'm going to have to put him in the kennel." or things of the like. Maybe it was funny in high school, but in the real world do you really want to be named like you are a Persian cat?

When I think back on it, I don't think I've ever taken anyone who has quotations in the middle of their name seriously. Are they trying to hide the fact that they have a weird name, by jazzing it up a bit and naming themselves after something they've done. The type that completely disregard their first name by saying, "I'm Joe, but you can call me thunderbolt." as if a rumble in the sky had anything to do with the person. Do they know that their newfound nickname will result in even more explanation than just giving their real name? Obviously not.

I guess nicknames make one feel wanted and special, but that novelty wears off and all that's left is a name. An embarrassing addition to oneself. Think about it, whenever these fake names are said about a person they don't scream for joy, rather they hide their face that is turning pink as a rose by the minute. But could you blame them? How would you like to be called lightening if your real name was Kevin?

That is all

-"M" or should I say, Mollie